A to Z April Challenge Letter Z

April 30, 2013 / 18 Comments

 Zachary. I thought about how to write this last post of the challenge. I knew all along it would be about Zachary, the baby in the family. But, what to write about Zac…… oh I could easily go on and on about how fabulous my son is… OR I could turn this into his very own e-harmony ad!!! (Dear Ladies, meet Zachary. Never married 32 year old cutie!)  OR…….
I could let Zachary tell you about Zachary!!
This is a copy and paste of what Zac wrote on his Shutterfly family page.  Enjoy!  (My kid is a crack up!! AND HUMBLE…. yea… humble my…… )  Ladies, if after reading this load of bio and you still want his number just let me know.
The Glory that is Zac
I am pretty much The Shit, I feel bad for those who do not know me.
I have sailed all 7 seas, climbed 8 of the 10 tallest mountains in the world, I’ve studied in Paris, I explored the Pyramids in Egypt, I am fluent in 12 languages including Sandscrit, I was a Tibetan Monk for 3 years, I have discovered 2 rare breeds of Falcons, 1 rare breed of Antelope and 6 species of deep sea fish all of which bare my name, I swung a hammer at the downfall of the Berlin Wall as well as built shelters for the nomadic Aborigines in Australia, I’m personally responsible for capturing Saddam Hussein and the Uni-Bomber, I saved a baby from the clutches of a Black Bear, I have Tony Blair’s number on speed dial (as well as other notable names) and he has me on his, I have hunted Elephant in the African Plains but only to feed the starving local tribes, I have delivered countless babies in war torn Israel, My ring-tone is the missing 11 minutes of the Watergate Tapes which I own, I gave the Hope Diamond to charity but the Holy Grail still sits on my mantle, I have met 4 Presidents and stayed in the Lincoln bedroom 6 times in fact the Presidents “Red Phone” rings directly to my cell phone which I almost always let go to voicemail, I rent a room to Jimmy Hoffa so he can lay low. In 1999 I was clocked as the fastest man alive, In 2001 and 2002 I made the cover of “People’s 25 Sexiest Men” (F^%* George Clooney) I have been awarded the Congressional Medal of Honor an unprecedented 4 times, Other awards include 3 Grammys 4 Oscar Awards and an impressive 21 Peoples Choice Awards not to mention 4 Adult Movie Awards, I have lived with the native tribes in the Brazilian Rain Forests, I planned the Alaskan Oil Pipeline, 5 of my houses have been on MTV’s “Cribs” all under assumed identities of course, Elvis Presley faked his death to get out of the $100 bucks he owes me, Chuck Norris has a book of facts about me, The Guinness World Book of Records has a volume dedicated to my accomplishments as well as “Playboy” and “Car & Driver”, July 24th is Zachary Gruning day in 37 states, The government is begging me to allow them to put my face on the one hundred dollar bill but I refuse, I run a animal shelter for endangered species as a result I am able to communicate with the Bald Eagle and Humpback Whale,  I know where the Lost City of Atlantis is, I have toured with Willie Nelson, Rancid, 2Pac, Don Ho and Micheal Bolton just to name a few, I have snatched up my car keys from the open mouth of a crocodile who was too afraid to bite me, I have degrees from Harvard, Princeton and Yale in addition to teaching at all three, I invented the Electric Car and Hybrids, The Stock Market crashed when I cashed out my 401k, I filmed the first walk on the Moon in a studio in Burbank, A pair of my socks sold on eBay for $250,000, I knocked up “Octomom” just by shaking her hand, I even recycle.
You are welcome,
Sir Zachary Gruning

  And all this time you thought I was the crazy one in the family!!

A to Z Challenge blog everyday except Sunday (per the rules) with my theme being what makes me happy, what inspires me and what makes me ME!!!  So be prepared for more information about me than you ever wanted to know!!

 I could use a click!  

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