Going up?!
Things to do in an elevator: I think I find this so hysterical because I can actually SEE my children doing THESE!!!!!!!!!!!!
1. When there’s only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn’t you.
2. Ask if you can push the button for other people, but intentionally push the wrong ones.
3. Hold the doors open and say you’re waiting for a friend. After a while let the doors close and say, “Hi Greg. How’s your day been?”
4. Drop a pen and wait until someone goes to pick it up and then scream, “That’s mine!”
5. Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.
6. Move your desk into the elevator and whenever anyone gets on ask if they have an appointment.
7. Randomly ask “Did you feel that?” When they look at you curiously, begin to explain your theory that a giant has made its way into the building, become more panicked by the minute.
8. When the doors close, announce to the others in a voice of forced calm, “It’s okay, don’t panic, they open again!”
9. Call out, “Group hug!” and then enforce it.
10. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering, “Shut up, all of you, just shut up!”
11. Crack open your briefcase or purse and peer inside periodically while whispering, “Got enough air in there?”
12. Stand silently and motionless in the corner facing the wall, without getting off. If someone approaches you, turn around and try to bite them.
13. Stare at another passenger for a while and then announce in horror, “You’re one of THEM!” and back away slowly.
14. Stare manically and grin at another passenger for an extended amount of time before announcing, “I have new socks on.”
15. Draw a little square on the floor and announce to the other passengers in an unnecessarily loud voice, “This is MY personal space!”
I’m Dusting Off Old Posts So Google Notices Me Again
You know that awkward moment when you run into someone you used to talk to every day and they clearly don’t remember your name? That’s basically my relationship with Google right now. So I’m fixing it. 🧹
Lately, I’ve been wandering through my older blog posts like a librarian with a red pen, updating headlines, polishing keywords, and gently reminding Google that yes, I’m still here and still weirdly productive. Updating old posts for SEO is like changing the batteries in your smoke detector. Nothing flashy, but suddenly everything works better.
I’m tightening things up, adding clearer headings, improving readability, and sprinkling in relevant links where they actually make sense. Not keyword soup. Not robotic nonsense. Just good content wearing better shoes.
Speaking of links, if you’re curious why this matters, Google itself has a surprisingly helpful guide on how search works. It’s worth a peek if you like knowing how the internet’s brain ticks.
And while you’re clicking around, this is also me casually pointing you to an internal post or two that needed a glow-up anyway. Old posts deserve love. And traffic. Mostly traffic.
Oh, and if you spot mentions of my monthly $50 Your Way giveaway, that’s not an accident. You’ll find that happy little temptation living in the sidebar. PayPal, Venmo, or gift card. Your choice. Every month. 🎉
So if things look a bit fresher around here, that’s me courting Google with better SEO and a side of charm. Wish me luck. And maybe click something while you’re here.